WELCOME LETTER FROM THE CO-EDITOR

Dear Human Readers,

First of all, thank you for being here. It means a great deal to have a readership composed of actual people, especially when your boss eats with his hands and once tried to fire me via a series of hoots.

As Co-Editor of The Witless Wire, I want to assure you that while our Editor-in-Chief, Hugo V., brings a uniquely simian perspective to the newsroom, we do in fact welcome human writers and readers alike. This is not a species-exclusive project. Though I will admit, some editorial meetings feel like episodes of Planet of the Apes: The Print Edition.

Hugo is brilliant. He’s also judgmental, unfiltered, and has an unfortunate tendency to refer to humanity as “a species held together by coffee and bad ideas.” That said, he’s rarely wrong.

My role is to provide balance. I edit, manage, translate the occasional outburst, and make sure the “send” button isn’t hit mid-banana-breakdown. I also make sure humans are not only included, but heard. Even if it means disagreeing with our primate-in-chief.

You’ll find pieces here that challenge, amuse, and occasionally offend. All delivered with sharp wit and a little existential resignation. If that sounds like your kind of journalism, you’re in the right place.

With a hint of optimism (and a draft folder full of rewrites),
Nina J.
Co-Editor, Human Division (Barely)